Yea, okay...my turn in the barrel. A little time in the communications division will give a person a fast reality check.
First, I'd like to say that dispatchers do not get paid enough money to tolerate the shit they take from both the public and even their friendly folks in blue. Yes, let's admit that cops can be arrogant little pricks sometimes, even to their co-workers. There's nothing like dysfunctional family love to bring out the best in all of us. And that's precisely what we are. One, big, not always so happy with your shit, kinda family.
The men and women who sit behind that computer screen, clacking away on a keyboard at better than 70 wpm, wearing a headset in one ear, and phone in the other, are valuable little saints who are virtually watching your back.
Bet you never realized that dispatchers do about 6 things at once and make it all look so easy? Then cops get a little impatient or snitty when dispatchers don't tell them what they want to hear, or send them on a crappy call, or they have to wait a few extra minutes for that paperwork check. The things they have to listen to on the other end of that phone line is enough to drive you to drink. And quite frankly, after 3 nights, I did. It's hell being in that dark little room, staring and flipping from one screen to the next at the speed of light and talking to the boys and girls that wear the red and the blue. Then....there's the adoring public...
People like to dial 911. Whether it's just a pocket or purse dial, maybe your kids got a hold of your phone, your neighbors dogs are barking at 3 p.m., you have questions about paying your traffic ticket, you need directions, and the all time favorite....what's the number to....? 411 - 911, so close, right?
Then you have to give some people credit. They are afraid that their problem doesn't constitute an emergency, so they call the direct line. Sometimes those are actual 911 situations.
Sometimes, you seriously wish you could reach out and bitch slap a few people. Dispatchers are not miracle workers.
I watched. I took calls. I entered calls. I listened to 3 different radio channels. You were doing nothing or you were doing everything all at once. It was hell.
Some of the calls I took....
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
Caller: I don't really have an emergency but....(that's always a bad sign)
One little old lady, whom I could barely understand, and had a really high pitched, raspy kind of voice, went on about her dear departed husband. I asked if she needed EMS, Fire or police? "No, don't need none of that." I had to ask her to repeat things a couple of times and finally she said, with a bit of a giggle, "guess you could probably hear be better if'n I put my teeth in?" Well, I waited for her to put her teeth in and she proceeded to tell me about her probate needs. Yep, she was telling me how to dispense with her things after she was gone. Meanwhile, while she's doing all the talking, the 911 operator is doing all the typing and a police officer has been dispatched to do what we call a, "welfare check."
Next call...
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
There's a man screaming on the other end, stating someone has been shot. He says, "get the fuckin' cops over here fast cause I'm gonna have to break the door down and get to him." About all I could get was that he was in some subdivision clubhouse, a man was down, he had to break in to rescue him, I was being stupid for asking too many questions, I needed to get someone over there....blah, blah...the more he talked, the more I was able to confirm that this is either a bogus call, or he's on drugs. Once everyone got there, they find he's hallucinating from bath salts. And go figure, he had a warrant. Wow, productive.
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
Spacey female caller: "ummmm...my boyfriend is bothering me." After the many standard questions, they're in the same motel (the best hotel/motel there is) room, he's not threatening her but she's under extreme stress, on meds and he just won't shut up. She wants a cop to get him to leave. Oh yea, there's alcohol and drugs. Cops locate boyfriend hiding in bathroom. He's got 2 outstanding felony warrants. Her wish came true.
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
"Those damn kids! They's a runnin' around here, making all kindsa noises, leavin' dare laundry all over da place, just a cussin' and disrespectin'...I want da poleece to come over and talk to dem. Well, they do and then... and elderly widower who lives alone, chases the cops off her porch while armed with a broom.
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
"Well, I think someone robbed my car."
Me: Robbed your car? You mean they broke in to it?
"What's the difference?"
I really played hell keeping a straight face on that one.
I asked if someone broke the window and stole stuff.
"yea, they robbed it."
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
My Mom is in ________nursing home and can't breathe. She said that she called for assistance from nursing staff, but no one has arrived yet. She's almost an hour away and someone needs to do something about it, NOW! She's getting impatient with the fact that she has already been transferred twice and I am about to transfer her a 3rd time. Look, people. 911 is not all knowing and all seeing. If you call from a different city, county, even state....you will not be instantly put through to the jurisdiction you want. In fact, some jurisdictions are such a puzzle or haphazard splice of parceled out crap, that a roadway could be in one jurisdiction but the homes or businesses are in another.
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
Drunk dude: "Hey....like my girlfriend, like, she says that, like, she took out a restraining order, like warrant, or like something on me and like, I want to know, like if that's true." Well, you can't tell them that over the phone. They can come down to the nearest house, show ID to verify, and we can tell you then. "Um, like, okay then..."
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
Screaming woman in the background who speaks some rough English, "Oh my God, Oh my God....I think dar's been a dog attack." I try to ask some questions. She puts the phone down and I wait....Finally, turns out her neighbor's dogs had a fur fight in their own back yard and owner of dogs got her dander up. "Oh, so sorry to bother you."
Some people call the police department believing that they are all knowing, all seeing and have all the answers. Sometimes people have a problem just getting to the point and then when you ask a direct question and actually push them for info, they feel indignant because you're pressed for time. Well, DAH!
I had a number of callers who talk faster than the human hands could possibly type. I'm gettin' on in years and the memory ain't as good as it used to be so I was trying to memorize shit and type it later. People were getting frustrated because I had to ask the question a number of times. Hey, imagine how frustrated I am. I surely want to help you, but you have to help me.
Here's some words of advice:
The dispatcher has a call screen in front of them that is set up to get the basics on the board, which is then sent to the other dispatcher, who in turn broadcasts it out to street units or enters it on the officer's computer aided dispatch screens. A simple, yet ingenious system, that saves more time than you can imagine.
So, when you call 911 or even the direct line, remember these basics...
WHAT is the nature of your call? (police - fire - ems)
then cut to the chase; "I was assaulted" "He's having a heart attack" "I heard shots."
WHERE: Give the exact location of the incident. (Sometimes there's jurisdictional issues)
WHEN : How long ago or is it happening right now?
WHO: Who is calling the police? Please give your name, address and phone number clearly and at a rate that is less than the speed of light.
WEAPONS: Yea, funny thing about that. We really don't like it when people have guns. Makes us all kinda nervous and such. Even if you own it legally, please tell us.
Lastly, dispatchers will do their damndest to help you in any way, shape or form, but they really don't have time to listen to a long winded story about anything and everything. They want the basics and they want to send it off to the officers. After that....it's out of their hands. The end.
Oh, and if your dispatcher wants coffee or a donut, be a good sport. They really do give you so much.
First, I'd like to say that dispatchers do not get paid enough money to tolerate the shit they take from both the public and even their friendly folks in blue. Yes, let's admit that cops can be arrogant little pricks sometimes, even to their co-workers. There's nothing like dysfunctional family love to bring out the best in all of us. And that's precisely what we are. One, big, not always so happy with your shit, kinda family.
The men and women who sit behind that computer screen, clacking away on a keyboard at better than 70 wpm, wearing a headset in one ear, and phone in the other, are valuable little saints who are virtually watching your back.
Bet you never realized that dispatchers do about 6 things at once and make it all look so easy? Then cops get a little impatient or snitty when dispatchers don't tell them what they want to hear, or send them on a crappy call, or they have to wait a few extra minutes for that paperwork check. The things they have to listen to on the other end of that phone line is enough to drive you to drink. And quite frankly, after 3 nights, I did. It's hell being in that dark little room, staring and flipping from one screen to the next at the speed of light and talking to the boys and girls that wear the red and the blue. Then....there's the adoring public...
People like to dial 911. Whether it's just a pocket or purse dial, maybe your kids got a hold of your phone, your neighbors dogs are barking at 3 p.m., you have questions about paying your traffic ticket, you need directions, and the all time favorite....what's the number to....? 411 - 911, so close, right?
Then you have to give some people credit. They are afraid that their problem doesn't constitute an emergency, so they call the direct line. Sometimes those are actual 911 situations.
Sometimes, you seriously wish you could reach out and bitch slap a few people. Dispatchers are not miracle workers.
I watched. I took calls. I entered calls. I listened to 3 different radio channels. You were doing nothing or you were doing everything all at once. It was hell.
Some of the calls I took....
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
Caller: I don't really have an emergency but....(that's always a bad sign)
One little old lady, whom I could barely understand, and had a really high pitched, raspy kind of voice, went on about her dear departed husband. I asked if she needed EMS, Fire or police? "No, don't need none of that." I had to ask her to repeat things a couple of times and finally she said, with a bit of a giggle, "guess you could probably hear be better if'n I put my teeth in?" Well, I waited for her to put her teeth in and she proceeded to tell me about her probate needs. Yep, she was telling me how to dispense with her things after she was gone. Meanwhile, while she's doing all the talking, the 911 operator is doing all the typing and a police officer has been dispatched to do what we call a, "welfare check."
Next call...
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
There's a man screaming on the other end, stating someone has been shot. He says, "get the fuckin' cops over here fast cause I'm gonna have to break the door down and get to him." About all I could get was that he was in some subdivision clubhouse, a man was down, he had to break in to rescue him, I was being stupid for asking too many questions, I needed to get someone over there....blah, blah...the more he talked, the more I was able to confirm that this is either a bogus call, or he's on drugs. Once everyone got there, they find he's hallucinating from bath salts. And go figure, he had a warrant. Wow, productive.
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
Spacey female caller: "ummmm...my boyfriend is bothering me." After the many standard questions, they're in the same motel (the best hotel/motel there is) room, he's not threatening her but she's under extreme stress, on meds and he just won't shut up. She wants a cop to get him to leave. Oh yea, there's alcohol and drugs. Cops locate boyfriend hiding in bathroom. He's got 2 outstanding felony warrants. Her wish came true.
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
"Those damn kids! They's a runnin' around here, making all kindsa noises, leavin' dare laundry all over da place, just a cussin' and disrespectin'...I want da poleece to come over and talk to dem. Well, they do and then... and elderly widower who lives alone, chases the cops off her porch while armed with a broom.
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
"Well, I think someone robbed my car."
Me: Robbed your car? You mean they broke in to it?
"What's the difference?"
I really played hell keeping a straight face on that one.
I asked if someone broke the window and stole stuff.
"yea, they robbed it."
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
My Mom is in ________nursing home and can't breathe. She said that she called for assistance from nursing staff, but no one has arrived yet. She's almost an hour away and someone needs to do something about it, NOW! She's getting impatient with the fact that she has already been transferred twice and I am about to transfer her a 3rd time. Look, people. 911 is not all knowing and all seeing. If you call from a different city, county, even state....you will not be instantly put through to the jurisdiction you want. In fact, some jurisdictions are such a puzzle or haphazard splice of parceled out crap, that a roadway could be in one jurisdiction but the homes or businesses are in another.
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
Drunk dude: "Hey....like my girlfriend, like, she says that, like, she took out a restraining order, like warrant, or like something on me and like, I want to know, like if that's true." Well, you can't tell them that over the phone. They can come down to the nearest house, show ID to verify, and we can tell you then. "Um, like, okay then..."
Me: 911 what is your emergency?
Screaming woman in the background who speaks some rough English, "Oh my God, Oh my God....I think dar's been a dog attack." I try to ask some questions. She puts the phone down and I wait....Finally, turns out her neighbor's dogs had a fur fight in their own back yard and owner of dogs got her dander up. "Oh, so sorry to bother you."
Some people call the police department believing that they are all knowing, all seeing and have all the answers. Sometimes people have a problem just getting to the point and then when you ask a direct question and actually push them for info, they feel indignant because you're pressed for time. Well, DAH!
I had a number of callers who talk faster than the human hands could possibly type. I'm gettin' on in years and the memory ain't as good as it used to be so I was trying to memorize shit and type it later. People were getting frustrated because I had to ask the question a number of times. Hey, imagine how frustrated I am. I surely want to help you, but you have to help me.
Here's some words of advice:
The dispatcher has a call screen in front of them that is set up to get the basics on the board, which is then sent to the other dispatcher, who in turn broadcasts it out to street units or enters it on the officer's computer aided dispatch screens. A simple, yet ingenious system, that saves more time than you can imagine.
So, when you call 911 or even the direct line, remember these basics...
WHAT is the nature of your call? (police - fire - ems)
then cut to the chase; "I was assaulted" "He's having a heart attack" "I heard shots."
WHERE: Give the exact location of the incident. (Sometimes there's jurisdictional issues)
WHEN : How long ago or is it happening right now?
WHO: Who is calling the police? Please give your name, address and phone number clearly and at a rate that is less than the speed of light.
WEAPONS: Yea, funny thing about that. We really don't like it when people have guns. Makes us all kinda nervous and such. Even if you own it legally, please tell us.
Lastly, dispatchers will do their damndest to help you in any way, shape or form, but they really don't have time to listen to a long winded story about anything and everything. They want the basics and they want to send it off to the officers. After that....it's out of their hands. The end.
Oh, and if your dispatcher wants coffee or a donut, be a good sport. They really do give you so much.
2 comments:
I've never had trouble with the dispatchers at my local 911 office, but then I always begin by identifying myself and telling them in 25 words or less just what the problem is.
Then there's this little gem that I overheard from the front seat of the car one eventful evening:
"Hi, nine one one? This is Flopsy and I'm in a car, well it's not my car, it's mommy's, no wait, we're in Grandma's car, and there's this guy driving a truck - no, I don't know, I'm just trying to report - um, well, I think we're in Michigan..."
Read the rest as it amuses you -
Michigan State Police (bust a drunk truck driver)
All that being the case, I'd give $10 to listen to you field 911 calls for an evening. How often did you manage to stifle yourself before the inevitable What the fuck?! escaped.
I think it took all of 10 minutes when the WTF's started. Of course, I used the mute button a few times just so I could chortle and use foul language. Trust me when I tell you, these dispatchers know their shit!
I will never, ever take them for granted again.
As for the other thing....I posted a comment on your link.
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