Most of the time, I pick a story and run with it. Usually I'm just ranting on about what's wrong in the world or oddities I come across. Sometimes people tell me stories and I might share it with you. I do love a good story, bizarre and otherwise.
It was late on Sunday. Generally speaking, a night that's rather chilly outside does help keep the roaches inside. Sunday night had a weird aura about it. Maybe because of the Monday holiday or maybe there was just something in the air. It seemed like every call involved alcohol, juveniles, and the weird and stupid.
It was kind of a chilly night for the southeast. The temps were hovering around freezing so what people that were out, they were bundled up.
Last night, the flag-me-down light was lit on the patrol car. At least 4 times, people waved us down as we were randomly patrolling.
For instance; It's 11:30 p.m. and we spot a w/m juvie loitering around the parking lot of a closed drugstore. He waves at us. We pull off to speak with him and then 3 more younger kids on bicycles come out from the side of the building. The one that waved us down was the oldest and 15 yoa. He apparently didn't mean to wave us over to him. While we're talking to him, we notice he's got a wad of tobacco wedged in his cheek. He's also wearing braces. My partner makes him dump the can and spit out the crap in his mouth. How can his orthodontist not notice that? All the kids have their own phones so we get an adult from one of them. An 18 year old brother comes to pick them up some 20 mins later. It's cold out and all of them were wearing some kind of camoflauge hunting gear. They looked like a bunch of mini me rednecks.
They really weren't a major problem and had respectful attitudes...but my kids sure as hell wouldn't be out at this time of night, school night or not.
We get flagged down at a gas station some 20 mins later by 2 w/m's who were gassing up. We recognize one as an arrest from the week before for being loud, wasted and stupid. He's whining like a girl because his former girlfriend got on his Facebook page, posted a nasty status update, changed his Facebook password and did the same on his yahoo email account. After she did all that, she sent him a text taunting him. If the idiot hadn't given her his passwords, it never would have happened. Nothing criminal yet. Sorry about your luck.
Funny. He's wearing camo pants and his buddy is wearing a camo vest.
Wear your camo day! No one told us.
We all know that jurisdictions can often be a puzzle. Sometimes you have to go outside your jurisdiction to get to the other side, or maybe your jurisdiction is one side of the street. We're passing a cemetery at 1:30 a.m. and a car's tail lights catch our eye. We turn around and enter the cemetery. Sad but true fact... the bronze vases and other statuary are often stolen and taken to scrap yards for the cash. Scrap yard dealers don't care where it came from. Even though we're very sure the cemetery is not in our jurisdiction, we pull in behind a mini van. We ask dispatch to call the proper jurisdiction, but we light them up and approach, seeing 3, maybe 4 people inside the van. We shine our lights around inside and don't see much of anything that would indicate criminal activity. We start asking questions of their reasons for being there and got a crazy ass answer. They show us some electronic equipment and a cell phone app. They were ghost hunters! Too funny not to believe from a couple of pimple faced geeks.
We cancel the back up and tell them to leave. We laugh hysterically and try to tell dispatch what we just did without sounding like giggly little girls.
About 2 a.m. and we're sitting at a traffic light minding our own business when some old guy over at the local Stop n Rob is yelling, "HEY MR. POLEECE!" We do our civic duty and make a u-turn. It becomes apparent that our number one fan is wearing a good many layers of clothes and is not so coordinated. He can't wave his arms and walk at the same time. It puts him off balance and he falls. All those layers of clothes protects him though, as he barely notices and bounces right back up like it's an every day occurrence. We get up close with the car. We get 10 feet away from him and we give each other that silent look. You know, that certain "oh, shit" look partners give each other when they know that the last thing they wanted to deal with tonight was a slobbering, smelly drunk. Yea, we both have to get our asses out of the car and freeze while talking to this drunken fool. The guy's a mumbler and we hear every other word, and that word we do hear jumps about 10 decibels. He's a wobblin' and holding on to the car to steady himself. We finally get that the Stop n Rob was not hospitable to him and ejected him from the premises. He was indeed insulted. Of course, when you're dealing with a smelly drunk, they always want to get up close and personal, and they want you to give them a ride. Stupid ass doesn't even remember how he got there. As luck would have it, we were able to contact someone who got him in about 20 minutes. WHEW! Crisis averted.
Some of you have laptops in your car and there's those rare occasions that they actually work. The DMV goes down, the server is slow...blah, blah. You shut it down, you sign back in. No luck. When this happens, you have to do it the old-fashioned way. Call the dispatcher on the radio and run it. The dispatchers know who has computers in their cars and who doesn't. Sometimes it's kind of boring and someone needs to liven things up. We ran a guy's DL number the other day and well, we were saving this one for a special occasion. We gave the dispatcher the DL number. Within seconds, the dispatcher is attempting to pronounce an Indian first name that is about 15 characters long. She tries it twice and then catches on by saying, "you have it on your screen, don't you?" We will, of course, be paying for that one.
It's 3 a.m. and most everyone with any sense is inside some place warm. Oh Christ! Wal-mart is open 24/7.
Oh no....a shoplifter on a motorized shopping cart. Hot pursuit. It was a harrowing and exhausting chase, but we caught our man. He did not want to go to jail.
And get this, the very large larcenous lunatic was wearing a green camouflage hat.
It was late on Sunday. Generally speaking, a night that's rather chilly outside does help keep the roaches inside. Sunday night had a weird aura about it. Maybe because of the Monday holiday or maybe there was just something in the air. It seemed like every call involved alcohol, juveniles, and the weird and stupid.
It was kind of a chilly night for the southeast. The temps were hovering around freezing so what people that were out, they were bundled up.
Last night, the flag-me-down light was lit on the patrol car. At least 4 times, people waved us down as we were randomly patrolling.
For instance; It's 11:30 p.m. and we spot a w/m juvie loitering around the parking lot of a closed drugstore. He waves at us. We pull off to speak with him and then 3 more younger kids on bicycles come out from the side of the building. The one that waved us down was the oldest and 15 yoa. He apparently didn't mean to wave us over to him. While we're talking to him, we notice he's got a wad of tobacco wedged in his cheek. He's also wearing braces. My partner makes him dump the can and spit out the crap in his mouth. How can his orthodontist not notice that? All the kids have their own phones so we get an adult from one of them. An 18 year old brother comes to pick them up some 20 mins later. It's cold out and all of them were wearing some kind of camoflauge hunting gear. They looked like a bunch of mini me rednecks.
They really weren't a major problem and had respectful attitudes...but my kids sure as hell wouldn't be out at this time of night, school night or not.
We get flagged down at a gas station some 20 mins later by 2 w/m's who were gassing up. We recognize one as an arrest from the week before for being loud, wasted and stupid. He's whining like a girl because his former girlfriend got on his Facebook page, posted a nasty status update, changed his Facebook password and did the same on his yahoo email account. After she did all that, she sent him a text taunting him. If the idiot hadn't given her his passwords, it never would have happened. Nothing criminal yet. Sorry about your luck.
Funny. He's wearing camo pants and his buddy is wearing a camo vest.
Wear your camo day! No one told us.
We all know that jurisdictions can often be a puzzle. Sometimes you have to go outside your jurisdiction to get to the other side, or maybe your jurisdiction is one side of the street. We're passing a cemetery at 1:30 a.m. and a car's tail lights catch our eye. We turn around and enter the cemetery. Sad but true fact... the bronze vases and other statuary are often stolen and taken to scrap yards for the cash. Scrap yard dealers don't care where it came from. Even though we're very sure the cemetery is not in our jurisdiction, we pull in behind a mini van. We ask dispatch to call the proper jurisdiction, but we light them up and approach, seeing 3, maybe 4 people inside the van. We shine our lights around inside and don't see much of anything that would indicate criminal activity. We start asking questions of their reasons for being there and got a crazy ass answer. They show us some electronic equipment and a cell phone app. They were ghost hunters! Too funny not to believe from a couple of pimple faced geeks.
We cancel the back up and tell them to leave. We laugh hysterically and try to tell dispatch what we just did without sounding like giggly little girls.
About 2 a.m. and we're sitting at a traffic light minding our own business when some old guy over at the local Stop n Rob is yelling, "HEY MR. POLEECE!" We do our civic duty and make a u-turn. It becomes apparent that our number one fan is wearing a good many layers of clothes and is not so coordinated. He can't wave his arms and walk at the same time. It puts him off balance and he falls. All those layers of clothes protects him though, as he barely notices and bounces right back up like it's an every day occurrence. We get up close with the car. We get 10 feet away from him and we give each other that silent look. You know, that certain "oh, shit" look partners give each other when they know that the last thing they wanted to deal with tonight was a slobbering, smelly drunk. Yea, we both have to get our asses out of the car and freeze while talking to this drunken fool. The guy's a mumbler and we hear every other word, and that word we do hear jumps about 10 decibels. He's a wobblin' and holding on to the car to steady himself. We finally get that the Stop n Rob was not hospitable to him and ejected him from the premises. He was indeed insulted. Of course, when you're dealing with a smelly drunk, they always want to get up close and personal, and they want you to give them a ride. Stupid ass doesn't even remember how he got there. As luck would have it, we were able to contact someone who got him in about 20 minutes. WHEW! Crisis averted.
Some of you have laptops in your car and there's those rare occasions that they actually work. The DMV goes down, the server is slow...blah, blah. You shut it down, you sign back in. No luck. When this happens, you have to do it the old-fashioned way. Call the dispatcher on the radio and run it. The dispatchers know who has computers in their cars and who doesn't. Sometimes it's kind of boring and someone needs to liven things up. We ran a guy's DL number the other day and well, we were saving this one for a special occasion. We gave the dispatcher the DL number. Within seconds, the dispatcher is attempting to pronounce an Indian first name that is about 15 characters long. She tries it twice and then catches on by saying, "you have it on your screen, don't you?" We will, of course, be paying for that one.
It's 3 a.m. and most everyone with any sense is inside some place warm. Oh Christ! Wal-mart is open 24/7.
Oh no....a shoplifter on a motorized shopping cart. Hot pursuit. It was a harrowing and exhausting chase, but we caught our man. He did not want to go to jail.
And get this, the very large larcenous lunatic was wearing a green camouflage hat.
1 comment:
haha! I love stories like this!
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